Made my mind up, I wasn’t going to school today. Got up late, got dressed and left the house at 10:30, but didn’t go to school, instead went to Shelia’s.She’s pretty fat and wide, but feels great being pregnant. We drove to Toes, then to Malibu and back. Went out to lunch at Roberts, then to Ed’s. We picked up Sharron and Kathy at school and went to Joanne M. (she has a new baby.) We couldn’t find her house so we went home. The school called but only Daddy answered, so I’ll get out of it. Felt sick so I went to bed. School was kind of mad I wasn’t home when they called.
Instead of going to school, I picked up my friends in my 57 Chevy and cruised Playa Del Rey to Malibu, listening to music on the new radio. You could hear us coming with the widows down blasting ‘Run Away” so loud my speakers almost blew out.
April 7, 1964, Tuesday. Saffron Club Night. Met the rich kid across the street.
Had to go to school. Got there early. Got out of trouble by telling them I had just gone out with Mommy, and Daddy didn’t know we had left. It was good to be back. Told everyone about Lew’s band not being able to play for our dance. They were shocked, but we got the “Esquire’s.” They are playing for the Ja’Ketts Saturday…for the Hula-Hop. Sure hope our dance is as good. Hope Westchester kids come. They’ll probably start a fight or dance dirty. After school came home. Fire Engines were going up our street and I stood outside watching, when the guys from the Estate across the street asked if I wanted to go after them, I said no. Donna and I went inside their Estate and saw all the animals. The boys are Car Feigns. Hope they don’t bug me, (annoy me,) because I’m not interested in them. Went to the meeting, than to Fosters and home.
I wasn’t interested in Car-Guy Culture, so even though the kids in the big Estate across the street were rich, they weren’t Surfers, so I shut them down,so they wouldn’t bug me.
April 1, 1964, Wednesday. I’ve been driving for one year.
Didn’t sleep again all night. I just can’t eat or drink a thing without throwing up. Trying to find a position to be free of pain, but it’s hard. I finally fall asleep for an hour sometime, but get up and take more pain pills and a hot bath to relax. Sometimes, I take a hot bath every hour, even while my family is sleeping at night. I feel bad that they have to suffer with me.
April 2, 1964, Thursday, Too sick and dazed to write.
April 3, 1964, Friday, Feel better today.
My cousin Big John called from the Marine base at Camp Pendelton today, but I didn’t want to talk to him. He’s really bugging me, demanding. Had Mommy tell him I was sleeping. Daddy want’s me to fix him up with Susan Thompson. They would make a good couple I think. Wish I could meet some boy I’d really like because I need another boyfriend. (Not Jewish this time.) I don’t think Howard and I will ever go back, but we’ll always be friends. I don’t love him like I used to. I still think of the little things we use to do and I wish I had him back.
April 4, 1964, Saturday. Felt good
Washed my hair. Didn’t do anything. Howard went to UCLA Mardi Gras and won a stuffed animal. Should have gone. Didn’t know about it. Didn’t do anything.
April 5, 1964, Sunday. Well Day. Mad Day.
Woke up feeling well. That’s the other thing about my sickness, it leaves as fast as it comes. I feel fantastic when the spells pass. Cleaned the house. Called Lauri to come with me to Lew’s. But, she wasn’t home, so my sister Donna had to come.When I got there I saw Howard’s car and started shaking. I was so scared. Knocked on the door and Bryan answered. Then I got the shock of my life. Lew told me he couldn’t play at the Saffron Dance. I started screaming as loud as I could, than started to cry. Howard felt sorry for me because it was sort of his fault. Guess we’ll have to get the “Esquires,” but, what a spot they put me in. The lead player quit, so there was nothing Lew could do. Howard said he would come. John called. Going skating Saturday.
Called Marilyn to tell her that I was sick, so she drove us to school. I get sick every six weeks. Doctor’s can’t find an answer. I guess I’ll never get well. I want to die, I hate telling people I’m sick again. I hope I get through school this year. I get so sick, ( It’s probably all in my head,) but It’s so painful! I get blocked up and throw up for two weeks. I’d give anything to be a normal healthy girl. When I’m well though, people can’t believe I’d ever be sick, cause I am normal.
March 31, 1964, Tuesday. Sick – Went to the Doctors.
Rained all day. It feels safe to lay by the fireplace with the rain coming down. Nana came over and talked to me about Science of Mind. I went to see Doctor Zampetti, the Doctor who delivered me. I was afraid. He gave me some gastric suppositories to help me from throwing up. I got sick driving home and was sick all night. I cried and screamed from pain. Mommy called the Doctor again, he said to give me anything I wanted to eat, but to make sure I take the pills. I took sleeping pills, they gave me bad chest pains and couldn’t sleep all night. There must be a reason for this pain and nausea. I can’t hold anything down. I think the Doctor doesn’t know what to do, so he gives me pills to keep quiet.
So sadly my years of pill popping started, because Doctor’s couldn’t figure out what else to do for me. Eventually I would have exploratory surgery and my appendix removed. But I continued to be sick for 20 years. The miracle came when I found an alternative Doctor in 1979 who began fasting me and changed my diet to vegetarian. I was never sick again and still follow a strict way of life.
I’m so depressed. I feel like there’s nothing to live for.As soon as I’m well I’m sick again. We got some terrible news from Chicago. My dad’s cousin Dick Williams called, his little six year old girl, Laura, was killed by a car. She died last night at 12:00. Dad’s cousin Al and his wife Jean left for Chicago today. The funeral in Monday. That’s the saddest thing that could ever happen, especially the day before Easter. John called, he wanted me to go to Surf Films with him, but I told him I was sick. Than my cousin Big John called, (he was really sad about Laura.) He wanted me to get a date for his friend and go out, but I couldn’t.
March 29, 1964. Easter Sunday.
Thought I might feel better today but I didn’t. Easter was nothing to me this year. Of course I don’t know why it should make any difference. This is the third year I’ve been sick. Didn’t go to Church. Washed my hair for school, but got real sick. Granddaddy ate over. Billee and Preston got two rabbits for Easter. I give them about a week to live around here. Daddy called Unk-Ile and told him about Laura. He was real sad. I got on the phone and told him I had the letter for him with the survey from my friends, about Maybelline Liquid Eyeliner. I told him I was sick, but would mail it. I haven’t thought about Howard for a long time, in fact I don’t think about anyone.
March 27, 1964, Friday. Glad to get home. Well I’m sick again.
Didn’t sleep all night. Woke up sick and in a daze. Had to fix breakfast. Couldn’t eat. Wanted to go home, but didn’t think I could drive. I looked real ugly, didn’t even bother to get dressed up. Wore my hair set. Took last pictures before we left.My car wouldn’t start. I was scared we would be stuck there. Finally about 1:00 we got started. Marilyn’s battery went dead. We had to push her. I drove so fast on the Freeway I lost her. Her car broke down. Think I blew my muffler. Got lost, but finally made it home. It was 4:00 and I was too sick to bring in all my luggage. Mom wanted to leave in the morning and go back up to Crestline with the whole family for Easter. I told her I’d never go back up there again. Was sick all night.
Vogue 1964. My ego identified with this kind of High Fashion, but would up like this….
March 26, 1964, Thursday. Bored, wish I was home. Nobody good here in Crestline. Feel sick.
Marilyn opened the curtains at 8:00. I had to get up and fix breakfast. We asked Mrs. Q, our Chaperon, if we could drive to Snow Valley and were surprised when she said yes! We took a Sled and Skis and 6 girls. It took an hour to get there and it was boiling hot. Janie and I were the only girls who didn’t Ski. We sat around and ate and talked to boys. We were real snobs. Told ugly boys not to talk to us, because we were Culver City Snobs. We were bored. Two boys took our addresses and telephone numbers. They talked to us for a long time. One was doll, but they were kind of old. When we left, we lost the sled, but found it, thank God. We got home late. Nish got hit in the eye bad Didn’t do anything at night, because of last night. I was sick all night.
A person who at the least, gives off the impression of having a superiority complex towards everyone outside his or her social circle with body language and words. Snobs come in many shapes in forms and in just about every style, e.g., Preppy snobs, Artistic snobs, Musical snobs, and even Redneck snobs. Whatever group of snobs someone belongs to, they act like they know everything in that area of knowledge and are less than friendly toward outsiders.
In my case I was a “Cool Guy Snob” when it came to dating…. If a guy came on to me and didn’t meet my “Cool Surfer criteria,” I was blatantly not interested. This made me appear Stuck-Up. I think all my friends were that way in High School.
March 25,1964, Wednesday. Pretty much fun t get away. (Howard gets his car back today.)
Got off about 10:00. Got to Crestline about 1:00. We stopped to get antifreeze in the car and eat. Everyone named me Barbie Doll, because of all the matching capris, sweaters and scarves I brought. We got to the cabin and unpacked. We went driving around. Weren’t any cute boys. Bought some rain boots cause all I brought was tennis shoes. That night we all got dressed up to go out. I wore my yellow capris and Black fur sweater. Everyone wore my sweaters and capris. Went looking for parties. Went to some apartment, all the boys were drunk. There were two cute boys… Followed them to find some party. It was a “HANG.” We almost froze. Went back and talked to some boys in the bowling alley. The two cute boys liked me and Jayne. They thought we were sisters. They called me a phony and a “Put on.” One boy said I was the perfect girl for the song “She was just Seventeen. I told him I was 16. He was shocked, thought I was older.
My Saffron name was Barbie Doll and when my friends needed to look knock-out perfect, they raided my closet, and borrowed my beautiful outfits. I even did their hair and makeup for them. The Maybelline Girl, gave them the stamp of Barbie Doll perfection
something that isn’t what it actually is, or someone pretending to be someone they are not. Not being real. I guess I hid behind my perfect clothes, perfect makeup and hair, but didn’t have a clue how to be my real self. I created my own Sharrie Brand of fashion, style and attitude, but I didn’t know how to be authentic, or I thought “authentic wouldn’t be popular.” I was a wanna-be and compared myself with models in magazines or Stars in Film. My friends liked to put on the Sharrie clothes, because it drew attention to them. Made them look “Put Together.” That’s why I didn’t look 16…. a 16 year old wasn’t a sophisticated Hollywood Snob.
The Beatles – I saw Her Standing There (She Was Just 17.)
March 24, 1964. Tuesday. Donna’s 15th Birthday. Saffrons going to Crestline.
Well, we didn’t go. But was glad cause I wasn’t ready to go anyway. Took all my Capris and blouses to be cleaned yesterday and couldn’t pick them up till today anyway. Took Lauri and Rhonda shopping to get something for their Mom’s Birthday Then went to the cleaners. They couldn’t find my clothes so we went to buy a cake for her mom. Went back and got half of my stuff. Took Lauri home and ironed my blouses. Lauri drove by with Fred. He got a new car, convertible, black. Then I went to pick up Marilyn and we went to have my car checked and to the bookstore. Went to the cleaners. Finally got all my stuff. Picked Billee and Preston up.Picked up suitcases from Granddaddy’s and again brought a coat to the cleaners. We’re leaving tomorrow.
Practically made a career out of going to the Dry Cleaner’s just to have all my Sharrie costumes ready to go, so I could make the scene in Crestline. But no proper Snow clothes.
Packed a few suitcases for my trip, with enough cosmetics and makeup to do a full Broadway Production.
March 23, 1964, Monday. Busy Day. Leaving for Crestline Tomorrow.
Mom and Dad came home last night. They had a great time on their trip to San Francisco, but, Dad looked sick. Rained all day. Had my car radio fixed for the trip. I brought all my Capris, blouses and skirts to be cleaned. Packed suitcase. Bringing enough clothes to stay a week, but, have nothing to really keep warm in.Tomorrow is my sister Donna’s Birthday, she’ll be 15. She went to look at Surf Boards. She wants to buy a second hand one for $70.00,but she didn’t like Moselle Boards, so didn’t get it. Went out to eat with Nana. All she talked about was her head. Sure hope there isn’t anything really wrong with it. Found out we’re not leaving in the morning because of heavy snow. Now we may not go! DAMNED!
It was ridiculous the amount of clothes I packed and not even any snow clothes. I still pack too much when I travel. No wonder I’m not a big travel-buff.
$70.00 in 1964 for a Longboard would equal several hundred dollars today and that was second hand. Wow! No wonder Donna was picky about the Surfboard she wanted to spend her Birthday money on.
Always a Drama Queen, I was hysterical after packing and getting my 57 Chevy, ready for the Saffron’s big trip to Crestline. Will we go?
Check back and find out.
Supremes Come See About Me.
I really wanted to go to Crestline with the Saffrons to distract myself from my breakup with Howard. I hoped he’d eventually “come see about me” and when he did, I’d act cool because I was doing exciting things.
March 22, 1964. Sunday. Fun night, almost got killed going down Tull Hill.
Went driving with Lauri and her friends. We drove by Lew’s. Three boy’s were standing out front of the house. I went nuts. I would be busted if if they recognized me cruising by their house. Luckily they didn’t know Lauri’s car! I got on the floor as we drove by. They checked Lauri out, but she acted like she didn’t notice. We went to see Ernie. He was mad at me. He couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t dance with him, just because Howard said no. He told me he still loved me. I never loved him, even a little. He said I was two faced, because I make both Howard and him think I’m their girlfriend. Went to Saffron meeting. After the meeting we went puddle-splashing in Angie K’s Station Wagon. Five of us were in the back seat lying down, than she went as fast as she could over big bumps and we flew way up in the air. It was so fun. The car broke down. We had to push it a mile in the rain. When we got it going again we went down Tull Hill and almost got killed when the car spun out in a puddle, it was so fun.
Car Crazy Cutie’s, speeding over bumps in the road… or down hill racing on Tull Hill…That was a favorite pastime on a rainy Sunday night. Especially if we could rip through a puddle, splash water, spin out, stall the car and push the for a mile in the rain.